Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Earthquake Bathroom

So being a resident of San Francisco, I often wonder what it would be like to be in a bathroom during an earthquake. Does the water shoot up from the pipe systems? Can you still brush your teeth with even strokes? Is it really hard to apply deodorant? That is why I think they should design earthquake proof bathrooms. Sounds crazy? Not really when you break it down.

  1. Where do you go during an earthquake? Doorway? Hallway? Under a tree with magical roots? Nobody knows. make it common knowledge that all bathrooms are built like Cold War bunkers and everyone will feel safe crapping in times of crisis.

  2. Speaking of crapping, that brings me to my second point. What happens when people are scared? That's right it's not pretty and it smells a little bad in the swimsuit area. So why not make it auto-response to get people to the bathroom, that way when the crisis is over they come out smelling fresh, clean and of course well shaven.

  3. Vantiy. Have you ever looked at yourself during a crisis? Seriously you're crying, panicked and of course creating terrible creases in your complexion. If people had mirrors like they do in bathrooms they would see how foolish them look during an earthquake and quickly straighten out and look decent for cameras.

So if we had earthquake proof bathrooms, not only would not be dead after an earthquake, they would smell nicer and look decent in the face of a crisis and those are really things we can't do without.