Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Nasty Bath - Hooters, Las Vegas

Well it has happened, I have guilted myself into maintaining this shitty idea for a blog, so here it is, the first offical nasty bath review of a bathroom other than the one 10ft from my bed.

So some people may know that I recently got back from fab Las Vegas, NV which was filled with drinking, gambling and basically nothing else...that is all i did for four days (it's really the American way). Well, the entire time I was there, I was very happy with the facilities, from the Palace, to the New York, New York bathrooms were great. I was happy to take shits without that little paper thingy that I doubt stops the transfer of any really commited disease (I am sure it fights of stuff like herpes, but that is because herpes is so damn lazy, I'd like to have some protection device to sit on that can stop syphilis, that would be some real protection, syphilis is hard worker). This was the way it was until my Monday afternoon experience. Sunday night was a heavy drinking night and much is the ritual after a heavy drinking night is the morning release of evils as some call it. Well after getting some b-fast in me I thought I was all good, but nothing was preparing to come out and with a full day of gambling and boozing ahead of me I didn't care to spend time messing around with the shitting situation, so on we went to the casino far form the strip and from civilized latrines (I found the last part out later). We Went to the Hooters Casino.

As soon as I stepped through those glass doors it hit me like a train wreck. Run did I to the closet bathroom and upon enterting did I lose all ability to take a shit since I was busy trying to control the vomit that the smell of that facility produced. The smell was a mix of fermenting domestic beer, urine of some that just drank puree aspragus, and of course the classic fecal matter smell that comes standard with the poor ventelation package in nasty baths. Of course, the florescent lights barley worked, their flicker cast a dim shadows over everything include the pieces of used toilet paper, a condom wrapper (why would anyone have sex in here?!) and dried pools of unrine. That is about as far as I got, I looked at the clogged sink, the trash bin overflowing and said to myself "I'd rather be constipated." The one thing great about that bathroom is that it worked as a natural crap stopper and allowed me to be functional enough to get to another hotel. Not to worry readers (or reader, I don't know), I did find a great facility at the MGM grand, gotta love those lions!

Yeah so that is about it for Vegas, avoid the Hooters Bathroom that is about all I got on that.